Big Apple Blog

You know that expression “White as snow”? Does not necessarily apply to the snow on the streets of New York City.

As stated in previous entries the “news” beleaguers me most of the time. Why a woman such as Anna Nicole Smith garners huge chunks of news time is news to me. Aren’t there hard working people who have not had plastic surgery, been addicted to drugs, and inherited a fortune out there who merit some attention? Let us say for example, people who are working on a cure for a disease, perhaps the next wave of clean energy, or have been teacher of the year. I’m not saying I don’t feel a bit of sympathy for someone who died early at age 39, but I must ask why proportionally such a death takes up such a large number of headlines?

But I can’t spend my whole life shuffling sand into the ocean so when Britney Spears started to garner headlines over the weekend with a new haircut, I decided to put aside my cynicism and embrace how this “news” could be important to each and every one of us. Surprisingly, it did not take me long to realize that Britney is not just a pop princess; she is a true example to us all and deserves all the attention she is getting.

First of all, have you ever stopped and thought about how much money you spend on hair care? An average hair styling appointment in New York City can run well over $100. And then there is the mousse, gel, curlers, and hot oil treatments. Now that Britney has started a family, she has to be worried about the cost of education for her children. More than likely they will attend private schools and they are not cheap. And by the time her kids reach college age, who knows how much college tuition is going to be. Think of all the money she is saving and what this means to the future of her children.

Second, there is the environmental impact of all those chemicals that are used to treat hair. Have you ever taken the time to read the list of ingredients in the average hair care product? There is no way all those chemicals can be good for the environment, let alone be beneficial to your skin and respiratory system. And think of all the animals that are harmed in the testing of these products. And on top of it all, if you blow dry, think of all the energy that is being used.

Yes, it feels good to set aside my cynicism for a moment and see the good in the news. Britney is a shining example to us all. Can you imagine how much money could be saved and devoted to charitable causes or personal savings if 300 million Americans all shaved their heads? It would be astounding! I can see it now, a Buzz Cut Revolution that could swing the tide of personal debt, worries about paying for education, energy consumption, and chemical contamination of our water supply. I am asking us all to embrace Britney. She is now my hero and deserves 10 minutes of every news cast. And to prove I put my money where my mouth is, I offer you this evidence . . .

Stumbled upon this VERY important factoid while perusing a art history book at a birthday party. Kirkpatrick is actually my step-dad’s family name, pretty cool.

When the Hudson freezes.

I have been preaching the power of orange for years now. It’s not often that I get positive public recognition for my choice of headwear. More often than not, I am the brunt of jokes such as, “Hey slim, you goin’ huntin’?”

I endure the scorn with a smile and on a Sunday trip to the Museum of Natural History I felt a bit of redemption as for a short time I became the envy of every man, woman, and child. The Museum has a conservatory filled with butterflies of varied shapes, sizes, and colors. Upon walking in, I heard people all around saying, “I want one to land on me. I want one to land on me.”

I walked up to a group of plants and was minding my own business when I felt a tap on my shoulder. A woman said, “Sir you have a large butterfly on your hat.” I turned around and saw several people looking at me. Instead of scorning me, they asked if they could take my picture.

Before I knew it there were two butterflies on my hat and one lady said, “They love that orange hat.” All the way through the conservatory I had butterflies landing on my head and people were pointing at me, this time for a good reason.

The aura or orange is obviously popular because a butterfly also descended upon Ariel’s head. I credit it to orange residue. It actually hung out on Ariel’s hat for over ten minutes.

For a least a few minutes, the hat transformed me into the envy of all. I never had a favorite insect, but I do now.

It is estimated that 8 Million children in the U.S. are not covered by medical insurance. The population of New York City is 8 Million people.